Bittersweet
by Shurikenx
Summary: [ItachixSasuke, lemon, yaoi] The darkness in his eyes was captivating, making you want to drown. Sasuke knew this. He knew it all. He knew he loved the one he had sworn to kill, the one who was slowly removing his clothes before him. [songfic,oneshot]


**A/N::**

Okay, I know I should be getting on with 'I can't dream alone' – but this was just a oneshot that I felt like writing. Aswell as being a oneshot, it is also a songfic. I haven't used lyrics from just one song though; I give credit to The Rasmus, using the lyrics from their song '_Dancer in the Dark' _and their song with Apocalyptica and HIM called '_Bittersweet_'. This is the main song of focus for this story. I've also included a few lyrics from the song by Tatu, '_Clowns_.' I hope that if you listen to the songs mentioned whilst reading, you'll get a good sense of the emotion and atmosphere. **Lyrics are in italics**. Enjoy, and please review.

* * *

**Bittersweet **

_I'm giving up the ghost of love._

_Endure the shadows cast on devotion._

- - - -

He was always in the dark, always in the shadows. He knew, even as he sped through the forest, with the fallen leaves crunching delightfully under his feet – that he was sinking further into the darkness. He could _feel_ his soul being dragged down, his feet pounding in his light sandals, his heartbeat pulsating in his neck… Such a raw sense of pure _feeling_ seemed to diminish the numbness that the shadows brought him.

The trees continued to flash past in whirls of green and moonlit-silver. The dead leaves on the ground which appeared so orange and yellow and copper in daylight, resembled nothing more than an inky carpet that crackled and spat when trodden on. All colours had faded to the basics: black, silver, grey, white. Even the skin of his collarbone and shoulder (for his endless running had caused his kimono to slip so elegantly from his shoulder) appeared a ghostly white. His black hair fell across his forehead and face, sticking to his brow and matting in front of his eyes.

An appearance which he shared – almost exactly – with another.

- - - -

_He is the one that I adore,_

_King of my silent suffocation._

- - - -

Ah, yes. Can't forget about him now can we? He hurt you so much – left you bruised and bleeding to clean up the corpses. Countless times he helped to bandage up your wounds, which now seem like little scratches compared to the gaping hole he left in your heart. Now, you have to wrap your own wounds. Now, you have to pick up the needle and sew the pieces of yourself back together. And everytime, _everytime_, when you hold that needle and take a deep breath, you know that you'll never be able to complete the job. Because the needle becomes blunt, and each press against your heart hurts more and more and more. The sewing thread, that black wiry thread that sickens you to touch, is running out. Soon, the pieces will be impossible to put back together.

Sasuke knew it all.

His heart had weakened - had been _rendered_ by hate and fear and sorrow… and love.

He could never ever forgive that…traitor…for leaving him behind. That's why he was chasing him through the forest, heavy sword clinking at his side as he sprinted across the damp ground. Mud clogged in his sandals, and he stumbled often, but he _couldn't_ slow down. The man who he was chasing couldn't get away again. Sasuke wasn't going to be left behind anymore.

- - - -

_Break this bittersweet spell on me,_

_Lost in the arms of destiny._

_Bittersweet._

- - - -

That's when he saw him. The red and black cloak that the man always wore to hide his body and lower face from seemingly unworthy eyes, fluttered briefly ahead – before disappearing behind yet another tree trunk. The moonlight caught the edges of the emblazoned detail on the fabric, before it melted into the shadows. Sasuke cursed, and forced his numbed legs to move faster.

He was gaining on him.

He was getting closer.

Seconds turned into minutes, and Sasuke began to see glimmers of the man more regularly. Every now and then, he would hear the catch in the man's breath as he ran ahead, or the gentle thudding of his hand on an occasional branch as he grappled for support. Sasuke revelled in the fact that the stronger, more powerful of the two, was actually running away.

In the darkness, Sasuke laughed under his breath.

- - - -

_I can't escape; I'm possessed by his love._

_I'm bearing the cross; he's turned into my curse._

- - - -

The man was now in his sight; his sight that was clouded with hate and hazy desire. Everything in his vision was tinted with scarlet, and although it may have been the lack of oxygen to his brain, Sasuke knew it was purely his anger.

That cloak was now merely metres in front of him; and, just as the forestry disappeared, and the two figures broke out into a clearing, Sasuke's hand grasped the fabric, and pulled.

Together they fell breathlessly into the darkness, their hearts thumping madly as one as they landed onto hard stone. The soft shadows of the forest were behind them; and the rough, cold ground of a cliff face was before them. They were on a plateau; a table-top above the civilisation far far below them.

Just as they landed, Sasuke's hand slipped from the cloak - only to tangle itself in long black hair. They stopped rolling for a second; and everything – time, space, even the rain that was beginning to fall – paused. Sasuke stared down into the man's eyes, and once again felt that sinking feeling in his soul. There was an uncanny similarity between the darkness of the night, and the darkness of those eyes. It was like…losing yourself completely… like _drowning_.

- - - -

_All this black and cruel despair, this is an emergency._

_Don't you hide your eyes from me, open them and see me now._

- - - -

It was a horrible sickening realisation, when Sasuke found that he was actually atop the man, pinning his body down as he straddled his hips.

'How the mighty have fallen,' he spat, glaring daggers of disappointment at the man below him. He didn't reply to Sasuke's words; all that left those lips were the pants of heavy breathing.

'Did you…not expect this?'

He spoke for the first time.

That condescending tone filled Sasuke's ears, and made his blood boil. Of course he hadn't expected this; to be holding the man down, with the roles clearly reversed. It was strange, so backward. Sasuke's hand quickly unclenched from the black hair, and instead, formed itself into a tight fist. Without hesitation he sunk it deep into the man's cloaked chest, hearing the cough that followed the punch.

'Fight me,' Sasuke said simply, raising his fist again to attack once more, whilst his other remained tightly holding onto one of the thin wrists. Once again, the man didn't reply.

'Fight back! This is what you _wanted_ – what you _knew_ would happen!' Sasuke's angry words were exaggerated with every punch that was thrown into the weak body. Blood fell from the man's lips, staining his chin.

'You told me to get stronger – and now I have, you won't fight me?! Coward! Hypocrite!! Fight me – fight back and prove yourself!! Fight - '

'-- I'm not going to hurt you, little-brother.'

Sasuke's fist paused in mid-air as he heard those treacherous words.

He didn't want to confirm the fact that the man below was his brother.

He didn't want to _enforce_ the idea that they were actually related by blood...

They were like strangers who knew each other very well.

'What…what do you mean?' Sasuke asked, lowering his fist and allowing it to land gently on the body below him. The rain was starting to fall harder now; the gentle hissing sound as it struck the nearby leaves of the forest resounded softly around them both.

'I mean what I said,' he replied. 'I'm not going to hurt you. Not tonight, not now.'

Sasuke sat there, atop the man, stunned. Rain trickled down the back of his exposed neck, the hem of his kimono doing little to stop his skin from becoming soaked.

'But…you've always hurt me! I don't understand… you, _they_ always hurt me – you…you never…'

His words trailed off to nothing as a cold hand stroked at the skin of his forearm, fingers gently touching, so faintly it was hard to feel. Tentative, hesitant, Itachi ran his fingers across the svelte skin.

Sasuke finally found his voice; his eyes fixed solely – as if mesmerized – on the light touch from his brother. It was a simple point of contact, but still so warming and…comforting.

'We were never really brothers, were we?'

Itachi remained silent, and his fingers stilled.

- - - -

_But you never changed, you never played your part,_

_And you have erased, all the fear from your heart._

- - - -

'We never had that… _closeness_… that siblings were meant to have… I…'

Sasuke's voice faltered, and a sob escaped his tight throat. It was so painful to be saying the truth – he could feel his heart thudding madly beneath his rib cage.

'I was never loved…by anyone.'

There. The truth. It stung both brothers deeply; a sharp, piercing harpoon lodging itself in both their hearts. Sasuke bit his lip, suddenly feeling so naked and exposed in front of the one he had sworn to kill, whilst Itachi simply laid there, hair soaked in the falling rain, crimson eyes softening at his Otouto's honesty.

'Don't speak such nonsense, Sasuke…' He said, lifting his hand from the lithe wrist to tenderly hold the back of the boy's neck. The spiky black hair was surprisingly soft in his hand, and he rubbed strands of it between his thumb and fingers.

'You _were _loved…'

Sasuke's tears seemed to melt into the rain, and he whimpered quietly into the hand at the nape of his neck. He closed his eyes as he felt Itachi sit up, his warm breath striking his damp cheeks, damp with rain and tears and sweat.

' - loved…by me.'

- - - -

_Bittersweet._

_I want you,_

_I won't let you go,_

_And I need you,_

_Oh, how I needed you._

- - - -

Itachi sat up from the ground, pulling Sasuke into his lap, the head in his hands falling onto his chest. Tears were a weakness to both brothers, but, it seemed so hard to separate rain from tears, that neither of them cared any longer. What were morals and principles? To have sworn to kill someone – purely derived from hatred and unfair reasoning? The words that they had shared a lifetime ago, on that fateful night when corpses littered the streets, seemed so…shattered. Fragments of sentences lodged within memories; memories which had been twisted and rendered and warped by jealousy and vengeance.

They didn't want to remember it any more.

It hurt to remember.

Itachi placed a soft kiss on top of Sasuke's head, tasting rain and sweat and dirt. He was captivated by his baby-brother's strength and beauty – not just physically, but hidden deep within the skin. Yes, he could praise the muscles and toned body of his – but he felt more inclined to notice the sheer _exquisiteness _that lay within the boy's small heart. He had been broken before, and he had picked himself back up again. He had lived his life with Itachi always on his mind – and, the older couldn't help but smile.

The feelings between them were very much mutual.

Sasuke lifted his head away from his brother's chest, before a muttering a quiet: '...take me.' Itachi hesitantly traced a finger across the boy's right collarbone, before nodding, and kissing the skin. '...if that's what you want, otouto.'

- - - -

_Break this bittersweet spell on me,_

_Lost in the arms of destiny._

_Bittersweet._

- - - -

Together they embraced in the rain; shrouding them in a hissing veil of water droplets. Their clothes stuck to their skin, their hair to their faces; but neither of them felt the cold air of the night chilling their skin. It was a beautiful night; the moon being the only witness to watch the clothes falling to the ground, and the pale skin being exposed to shine in its rays. Nobody saw the naked bodies pant and writhe and twist on the bare cliff face; with only a little shelter given by some old over-hanging trees. The shadows cloaked their act in secrecy – shielding them from eyes that could never see; never truly _understand _what they meant to each other.

Nobody would ever understand except them.

Sasuke cried out and entwined his legs with the pale ones beside him, rubbing his thigh against the elder's hip – shifting, arching, purely _feeling_ the skin with his entire being. His heart throbbed madly in his chest, making him breathless; only able to pant out whimpers and mewls of pleasure at the sensations that rocked his body to and fro against the stone ground. If this wasn't love, then Sasuke didn't know what was.

Itachi didn't once break the rhythm he had set between their bodies; the heavy rain numbed their skin, but only seemed to heighten their senses. Everything was felt, everything was heard – and, as both brothers reached completion, and collapsed once more to the ground beneath them, nothing had ever felt more perfect.

'I love you,' Sasuke murmured, inching his way over to Itachi's body, and draping himself across the rapidly rising and falling chest. Itachi's heartbeat resounded loudly in his ears – and he smiled, feeling his _own_ heart synchronizing in beat with the other's. Itachi lifted a hand from his side, and combed his fingers through Sasuke's hair.

'I've always loved you,' he whispered, his voice being swallowed up in the sound of the gently fading rain.

The moonlight that had watched upon their act, soon vanished behind a thick blanket of dark cloud. One by one the stars in the sky were dotted out, until all that remained was a sickly hue as the moon struggled to break through from behind its barrier.

It was a beautiful, sinful night…

And a truly bittersweet reunion.

Sasuke smiled, before the darkest shadows of the clouds wrapped around them; shoruding them; and held them together tightly, within the clutches of the night.

- - Owari - -


End file.
